Chapter VII: Relapse

Chloe’ tucked Rowan in that night.  It was an unusual ritual that she had not preformed since Rowan was a toddler.  But following the events of that night, Chloe’ thought it may smooth the waters between her and her daughter.

“Mom.”  Rowan paused, as if to be searching for the right words to say.  “Who is that man?  I know he’s a cop and is trying to put you away in jail, but I have the feeling that he wants something from us.”

Chloe’ closed her eyes and took a deep breath.  She knew this day would come, when Rowan would grow old enough to start wondering why they lived the way they did.  For so long she had lied to her daughter, about everything, that she was afraid to tell her the truth.  How could Rowan ever forgive her if she knew what she had done.

Chloe’ pulled the covers over Rowan and leaned forward to kiss her goodnight.

“I know you have a lot of questions Rowan.  And Mommy is just trying to protect you.  I promise, on your Fourteenth birthday I will answer any questions you have.” Chloe’ held out her hand as if to reach a verbal contract with Rowan.   Rowan looked at her mother’s hand inventively.  Mommy?  When on earth did she ever go by that? Rowan pondered.  With that she reluctantly shook hands with her Mom.  After all, her birthday was right around the corner.

After Rowan had drifted off to sleep, Chloe’ crept back into her room.  She watched as she lay peacefully in her bed.  She remembered when Rowan was a baby, how happy they all were.  Their home was always full of laughter and the warmth of love.  But there was no going back now, what was done was done.   Chloe’ left the room and quietly made her way down the stairs.  She stood in front of their front door entranced.  She knew that she should just turn around, head back up the stairs and turn in for the night.  But she felt this force pulling on her heart, leading her out the door.  Before she even realized what she was doing she was running down the street into town.

Chloe’ stopped abruptly in front of a building.  She looked around, not sure if she had the right place.  Just as she began to second guess her actions she saw his car and knew that there was no turning back now.  Room 2B, Room 2b, she said to herself as she searched in the pitch black night.  As she walked by a dim lit window she squinted her eyes and peered in.

Her heart skipped a beat.  She had found him.  Placing her hand on her chest, she tried to settle her rapidly beating heart.  Every time she saw him, her nerves went haywire.  Chloe’ reached out with a shaking hand to knock on his door.  But as the situation sunk in, she recoiled backwards.  This was a bad idea, she thought.  But it was too late, he had already seen her.

“I’m glad you came.”  Bryce said gently, as if to reassure her not to leave.  He had a lulling voice that immediately calmed every jittery nerve in her body.  They talked about the past and how they let their lives get so twisted in their endeavor to fulfill their dreams.  While trying to better their lives, they had in essence, ruined it.

“Would you like to come in for a while…”

Chloe’ gazed at Bryce thoughtfully.  And going against her better judgment, she accepted his offer.  After all, who could resist that smile.

Bryce made his way over to the liquor cabinet and took out a bottle.  He then casually poured two drinks, handing one to Chloe’.  She starred at the glass for a moment.  Shifting her eyes back to Bryce, she saw him pouring himself another shot.  Feeling her anxiety building again, Chloe’ quickly downed the “liquid courage”.  A few more drinks later the evening transformed into a blur. Maybe it was the booze talking or just to satisfy their fervent desire for one another, but the two lovers embraced in the solitude of the motel room, away from the condemning eyes of the world.